I was interviewed by the police.

Good Cop/ Bad Cop
Cop 1: We wanna make this easy on you. If you didn't do it, just tell us who did.
Me: I have no idea!
Cop 2: Bullshit! We all know you did it!

Good Cop/ Bad (Incompetent) Cop
Cop 1: We wanna make this easy on you. If you didn't do it, just tell us who did.
Me: I have no idea!
Cop 2: ...
Cop 1: Anything to say, Al?
Cop 2: Huh? Oh, I wasn't paying attention.

Good Cop/ Good Cop
Cop 1: We wanna make this easy on you. If you didn't do it, just tell us who did.
Me: I have no idea!
Cop 2: Okay.

Good Cop/ Nonsensically Racist Cop
Cop 1: We wanna make this easy on you. If you didn't do it, just tell us who did.
Me: I have no idea!
Cop 2: Oh, you quarter-Italian, quarter-Irish, quarter-German, quarter-Welsh pieces of shit are all the same!

Good Cop/ Chinese Cop
Cop 1: We wanna make this easy on you. If you didn't do it, just tell us who did.
Me: I have no idea!
Cop 2: 我讲中文

Good Cop/ Self-loathing Cop Who Covers Up His Low Self-Esteem By Talking About All the Girls He Gets
Cop 1: We wanna make this easy on you. If you didn't do it, just tell us who did.
Me: I have no idea!
Cop 2: I got so much goddamn pussy this weekend.
Cop 1: Al, come on, man. Focus! Is everything alright?
Cop 2: Yes.

Good Cop/ "Bad" (Michael Jackon song) Cop
Cop 1: We wanna make this easy on you. If you didn't do it, just tell us who did.
Me: I have no idea!
Cop 2: Cha'mone!

Good Cop/ Cop Who I Have Incriminating Photos Of
Cop 1: We wanna make this easy on you. If you didn't do it, just tell us who did.
Me: I have no idea!
Cop 2: ...Let him go.

Good Cop/ Self-loathing Cop Who Tries and Fails to Cover Up His Low Self-Esteem By Talking About All the Girls He Gets
Cop 1: We wanna make this easy on you. If you didn't do it, just tell us who did.
Me: I have no idea!
Cop 2: I got so much goddamn pussy this weekend.
Cop 1: Al, come on, man. Focus! Is everything alright?
Cop 2: ...No.

Good Cop/ Coked-up Cop Who Is Working on a Screenplay
Cop 1: We wanna make this easy on you. If you didn't do it, just tell us who did.
Me: I have no idea!
Cop 2: And then. And then! And then you realize that the dad, the dad, is the one who's been stealing the money from the business the whole time! It's a twist, man. It fucking ends with a twist! It's gonna be huge, man! I got lots of good shit bouncing around in my head, dude. I'm going to LA! I'm gonna do it.